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By the time Grayson Lee hurried down to the Corsicana Jail, a riot had broken out.

He didn’t have to ask who started it.  After hitting the buzzer at the back of the building, he was ushered inside by a harried looking police officer.

“Thank God you’re here!” the officer exclaimed in relief.  “All hell has broken loose.   The sherriff broke a tooth on Dallas’s cookies, Adelaide bashed him in the head with her purse because he offended Dallas’ baking skills…Then, when Billy showed up to give a statement, Dallas Jean and Adelaide escaped from their cell and confronted him in the interrogation room, with your daughter jotting down every word for the newspapers.  Of course, Dallas”–

“Son, just tell me where she is now,” Grayson interrupted, tugging at his necktie.  With every word, his chances for mayor grew smaller and smaller.

“She’s in the cafeteria, leading a protest,” the officer informed him.  Clapping Grayson on the shoulder, he said sympathetically, “I’ll still vote for you.  Don’t worry.  It’s not your fault your wife is bat**** crazy.”

“Thanks,” Grayson replied, wondering if he should be relieved or insulted.  Rushing down the hall, he dashed into the cafeteria.  The sight would have made him laugh, had it not been so severe.  Several prisoners in jumpsuits and handcuffs, along with most of the town’s media and several citizens watched as his wife and Adelaide paced on top of a cafeteria table.  Dallas Jean held a piglet in her arms while a goat chewed the end of Adelaide’s skirt.  A calf was nibbling Dallas’ purse as a llama looked on haughtily from his perch on the table.  Several television stations were there, with reporters inching closer to the table.

Clementine Jane waved at him from the corner, where she was scribbling furiously.  “Don’t worry, Dad,” she called over the noise.  “You didn’t miss anything.”

“Great,” Grayson muttered.  Shaking his head, he focused on his wife’s antics.  It was clear that Dallas Jean had become the unofficial leader of petting zoo brigade.

“Why should we let that dreadful man mistreat the town’s animals?’ Dallas Jean shouted, thrusting the pig in the air.  “Does this pig not deserve clean water, sanitary living conditions and quality slop?”

“Yes!” Adelaide bellowed, pumping her fist in the air.

“Does this calf not deserve proper vet treatment and lush green grasses for grazing?” Dallas Jean asked, placing her cheek next to the calf’s and fluttering her eyelashes.

“Yes!” Adelaide whopped, hopping up and down on the table.

“Does this llama not deserve a life of beauty and ease?” Dallas Jean asked, gesturing to the llama on Adelaide’s right.  The llama blinked, raising it’s chin regally.

“Yes!” the crowd roared in response, cheering and clapping.

“Adelaide,” one woman shouted, waving her heavily decorated purple hat.  Grayson winced, recognizing her as the wife of one of the best doctor’s in town and the president of the Corsicana Junior League.  “Adelaide, did you have any of your visions at the petting zoo?”

“Actually, yes,” Adelaide cried.  Flinging her arms in the air, she stared ominously at the sky.  “The images were too horrible to share….but I felt lots of fear.  Fear and evil.  Something terrible happened at that petting zoo.  Something terrible indeed.”  The crowd murmured and whispered as Adelaide stomped her foot into the table.  “We must save the animals at the Ever Roads Petting Zoo!”

The crowd went up in cheers, including the president of the Junior Leauge.  “I shall start a phone tree!” she shrieked, hurrying to the edge of the room.

“Wait, Irene!” Dallas Jean called.  Her blue eyes glittered with excitement.  Pulling a indignant baby chick from her rhinestone edged pockets, she faced the crowd.  “A phone tree is lovely, but it will take up so much time.  The fastest way to save the animals is by having a protest!”

“A protest!” Adelaide crowed.  “Brilliant!”  The crowd whopped and cheered, stomping their feet so hard the vibrations rattled Grayson’s molers.

“I shall inform the ladies!” the Junior Leauge president cried, scurrying out the door.

“Then it’s settled!” Dallas Jean cried, squeezing the baby chick and piglet to her bosom.  “We shall save the animals at Evers Road Petting Zoo!”

As the crowd roared around him, Grayson shoved through clusters of well-heeled ladies and common criminals to make his way to the luncheon table.  “Dallas!” he shouted.  “Dallas Jean!”

Dallas Jean shielded her blue eyeshadow-lidded eyes, peering down at him.  “Oh hello, Grayson!  Did you break us out yet?”

“Dallas, darling, what are you doing?” Grayson asked, trying to keep calm.

“Saving the animals,” Dallas beamed, thrusting a pig at him.  “This is Porky.  She, or he, whatever it is, is coming home with us.”

“I get the llama,” Adelaide informed him. “You can have the goat.”

“Uh, great,” Grayson replied weakly.  “Dallas, I don’t think this protest is a good idea.”

Dallas pursed her hot pink lips and tapped a crystal topped nail against her chin.  “Maybe we should do something bigger,” she mused.  “Something with fireworks…perhaps a parade of some sort…”

“Or a media campaign,” Adelaide suggested.  “We could start our own public access TV show to save the animals.”

“Like those tearjerking SPCA commercials,” Dallas Jean agreed, bobbing her large bouffant.  “That’s a brilliant idea.”

“Actually, I was thinking you could do something quieter,” Grayson murmured.  “Something like a bake sale.  At home.”

Dallas Jean narrowed her eyes.  “A bake sale? Me?”

“You like to bake,” Grayson reminded her.

“I do,” Dallas Jean replied.  “And every time I bake, you and the kids hide for three days until I give all the food away.  I’m not stupid, Grayson.  I know you think my baking stinks.”

“Your baking is wonderful,” Grayson fibbed.

Adelaide snorted and shook her head.  “You better learn to lie better than that if you’re going to run for mayor,” she informed him.  “Your opponents will eat you up.”

Dallas Jean narrowed her eyes, her fake lashes brushing her sculpted eyebrows.  “Grayson, what do you want?” she demanded.

“I want you not to protest,”  Grayson replied.  “I want you to go home and lay low for awhile.  This is going to be all over the papers and TV stations.”  He gestured to the media creeping closer to them.

Dallas Jean’s lips curled back in a snarl.  Clutching the animals to her chest, she grabbed the rope of the calf and climbed off the table.  “Listen, Grayson, I said I’d support you in running for mayor,” she hissed, poking him in the chest with a baby chick.  “I never said I’d be some robotic political wife.  You wanted me to help, and I am.  I’m helping the community.  And if your voters are too stupid to figure that out, we got bigger problems.” Tossing her blond curls over her shoulder, she stormed out of the room as the ladies’ groups and criminals parted like the Red Sea in front of her.

Adelaide pursed her lips, shaking her head.  “Don’t be like my husband, Grayson,” she warned, helping the llama off the table.  “Don’t sell your soul to politics.  You’ll lose Dallas Jean.”  Her green eyes flashing, she and the llama followed Dallas Jean out of the jail, the goat trotting behind her as it chewed on her skirt.

Suddenly, Grayson found himself circled by cameras and curious reporters.  Plastering a smile on his face, he turned on the charm.

***

“So, what happened?” Norman Wellington asked him later that evening.  They were relaxing in Grayson’s office, sipping iced tea and cold biscuits.  Grayson didn’t dare ask Dallas Jean to heat them up.  She hadn’t spoken to him once all evening, even after he paid both her and Adelaide’s bail.

“They dropped most of the charges,” Grayson replied wearily.  “Luckily, several police officers have various legal matters that needed clearing up.  In exchange for my pro bono, quiet work, they agreed not to prosecute Dallas Jean or Adelaide.”

Norman Wellington whistled.  “You better hope the press hasn’t heard about this,” he replied.  “They’ll crucify you.”

“They will.”  Grayson leaned his head back against his leather sofa.  “Maybe it’s not worth it, Norman.  I don’t want Dallas to hate me.  You should have seen her face when I asked her to stop the protest”–

“What protest?” Norman asked immediately.

“The one she’s holding at the Evers Road Petting Zoo in a few days,” Grayson replied tiredly.  “She’s determined to save the animals and get Billy fired.  Adelaide’s psychic powers convinced them something evil happened there.”  He shook his head.  “It doesn’t matter.  Between Clementine Jane working for the paper and Dallas Jean trying to help, it’s just not going to work.  God forbid my son get involved.  What could the poor boy do?”

“No, no,” Norman said, his eyes flickering.  Standing, he paced quickly in front of Grayson’s desk.  His grey eyebrows danced as his eyes glimmered.  “This protest might be a good thing after all…a good thing for us…”

To be continued…

Stay tuned, Invisible Friends!  We have a new critter confessions coming up and starting Sunday, the beginning of Halloween Week at the Pond!  Stay tuned!