Save the world. 

“ACK!”  A unfortunate maroon purse beat crashed down on the reporter’s upraised arms, smacking over and over.  ”You pervert!  Get out, get out!”

“I’m not a pervert!”  Kevin peeked around an elbow, wild eyes rolling as a make up bag crashed into his temple.  ”Tell her, Sassi!”

Sassi narrowed her eyes.  ”How did you know my name?”

“Because he’s a pervert!”  The secretary heaved her bag over her head, both hands clutching the straps as she jerked her arms down.  Kevin closed his eyes, wincing in anticipation.  Just as the heavy bag nearly slammed into his face, a tanned hand grabbed it, jerking it out of the sputtering secretary’s hands.

“Detective, arrest this man!” The secretary stomped her foot, brushing back stray hairs clinging to her sweat-slicked cheeks.  ”He’s a pervert!  He was harassing this young girl.”

“I wasn’t harassing her Starr, I was helping her!”  Kevin lowered his arms as Detective Starr grabbed him by the elbow, hauling him out the door.  ”Sassi, tell him.”

“I’m not telling him a thing until you tell me–Hey!”  Sassi protested as a tanned hand wrapped around her arm, jerking her out the door.  ”I didn’t do anything.”

“I should have known you would cause trouble,” Detective Star muttered, maneuvering both of his captives down the hall.  ”I should have known.”

“I’m trying to warn her about the cheesecake,” Kevin hissed, hiding his face behind his bag as Detective Starr steered them through the main office.  Several officers’ lips twitched and a few giggled, but none said a word as Detective Starr hauled them through the back hall.

“What cheesecake?” Detective Starr kicked a red button on the wall, and two metal doors swung open.  Glowering at the cop cars through the doors, Sassi scowled.  ”I’m not going anywhere with you.”

“I thought you wanted to go home.”  Detective Starr turned, ushering them down the aisles of identical white and blue cars.

“She can’t go home!” Kevin wheezed, his media badge flapping against his chest as he stumbled along.  ”She needs protection.  You have to watch her!”

“Let me guess.  Aliens?”  Detective Starr clutched Sassi’s arm to his chest, his hand fishing in his back pocket.  Glaring at him, she waited until he pulled out a pair of handcuffs.  ”Those better be for him.”

“They’re for both of you.”  Slapping one over each of their wrists, Detective Starr tugged his hat over his eyes.  ”Now don’t move.  I’ve got to find the keys.”

“Was this really necessary?” Sassi snapped.  ”After the night I’ve had…”

“”Your night is just going to get worse!” Kevin panted.  ”Listen, Starr, we’ve got to get her somewhere safe. Sassi is in terrible danger.  There are people…”

“The government, right?”  Starr rolled his eyes, digging in his briefcase.

“Are you a conspiracy nut or something?”  Sassi narrowed her eyes.

“No, I just”–

“Conspiracy nut?  Try a whole can!” Starr snorted, dumping several thick folders on top of the trunk.  ”Kevin is the writer and editor for an entire underground newspaper about aliens.  The Chronicle is his day job.”

“It’s not about aliens!  It’s about…”

“Elves, unicorns, martians.  Everything that doesn’t exist and never will.”  Starr peered into the bag and exclaimed, “There they are!”  Fishing out the keys, he grinned at them.  ”Now boys and girls, we can go home and I can pretend I never saw either of you again.”

“But Detective Starr”–

The glass window next to them shattered, a crack shattering the night silence.

“Look out!”  Smacking into the ground, Sassi groaned under the mass of khaki covering her.  Another shot whizzed by, glass raining down around them.

“And you thought you were going to get rid of me.”

Stay tuned, Invisible Friends!  We have a week full of whimsy coming up!

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